Whispers

A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.                      Proverbs 16:28 NIV

For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder. 2 Corinthians 12:20

You will be aware of the term, ‘Chinese Whispers’ which is nice way of saying gossip, or tattletale. Whispers sounds better, but we do a big disservice to the Chinese to tag them in that phrase. So gossip it is and gossip it remains.

The various acts of gossip are usually attributed to the womenfolk, but I have found that men are much the same, and as bad if not worse. You see, gossip is not just a soft whisper behind someone’s back. It can be peddled as an intentional deceit to mislead the thinking of others, to help turn opinions and preferences round to their own wishes! I would go as far as to suggest that this type of deliberate, deceitful gossip is the preferred instrument of the menfolk.

Not only does gossip separate close friends but it is listed among other (we would consider) more serious sins like discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder. This puts the action of the gossiper in a fresh light, doesn’t it? So we must be aware of the damage it can cause, and stay well clear. There is no such thing as it being a good thing. ‘Helpful words’ from a friend like, “I’m only telling you this for your own good”, or “I was told not to say, but…”, don’t count because it is still gossip, and we must be alert to these deceptions.

I Don't Gossip?

For I fear that perhaps when I come I may find you not as I wish, and that you may find me not as you wish—that perhaps there may be quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder. 2 Corinthians 12:20

The apostle Paul knew the people he was writing to, and was aware of their hearts. They claimed to be following Jesus, but they had some serious shortcomings. We think this verse can be discounted compared to some ‘bigger’ sins considered more significant, so why did he have to bring slander and gossip up at all? After all, we know better nowadays and don’t do that in our church, and anyway I wouldn’t stoop to that level when talking about anyone, and certainly never about my fellow believers. Right?

Do you ever listen to the words as they come out of your mouth, raw and unfiltered? Others listening might hear clues like, “Did you see what she did”? Or, “They made a right mess of that”. Or, “I wouldn’t have done it like him”. Or, “Other folk don’t like her, and I can see why”. Or, “He’s no good at that job, so he should quit and let someone else do it.” Or, “Are they really Christians, because you would never know”. Do you see yourself in these critical comments now?

Face it. You gossip, and so do I. Paul saw it in his Corinthian friends, even though they didn’t, and we are no different. Gossip is one of those sins we can see easily in other people, but don’t recognise it in our own lives. Because everybody does it, we just fit in so readily. The final word must come from Paul’s word to his church in Ephesus:

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29