But You'll Love It

I have a friend who seems to have many irons in many fires, and never stops for a rest. In some ways I envy his energy and enthusiasm, but not totally. When a few of our friends get together, he will always have something or some place we should visit or attend. It can be anything from a conference to a light business affair, and everything in between. Hardly a time goes by without him bringing up his thoughts of what he ’knows’ we would all like.

In most instances, everyone declines gently, but sometimes we have to be more emphatic and say, NO! This is always followed up with a repeat invitation as though no one had heard the first time. These things are not everybody’s cup of tea, but then he brings out the big guns, and with some excitement in his voice will raise his voice and say, “But You’ll Love It!”

I was thinking about this in respect of the Christmas celebrations and holidays we all ‘enjoy’. Or do we? The big assumption is that we will love it, in the same way that others enjoy the time which surrounds the Christmas season. But we don’t, do we? Not everyone looks forward to Christmas. Because of the generally expected hype, some will join in as much as they can, but their whole heart isn’t in it. So why doesn’t everyone love Christmas?

Think about the recently bereaved and the empty chair. The wayward child who doesn’t want to be home for Christmas because they are hurting too. The young couple who recently lost their hope for a baby, through no fault of their own. The destitute and homeless. The wife, whose husband just walked out on her and their children. The unhappy list could go on.

Please don’t miss the message when someone talks about a Christmas activity, and seeing the silent response, they say, “But You’ll Love It”. Be sensitive. Be a friend, and try to understand the heart behind the reluctant smile. Chances are they would love to be able to love this time of year as much as you, but they may not be ready. Not yet. Maybe sometime soon, but then again, maybe never in this life.

Downcast?

For when we came into Macedonia, we had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within. But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus, and not only by his coming but also by the comfort you had given him. 2 Corinthians 5-7


Being depressed is a dreadful medical condition, and not to be confused with feeling low or downcast. I think I would be right in believing that we all go through a period of darkness, or some would describe it as a wilderness. In any case it’s not a good place to be even when it can be understandable, and not to be compared with clinical depression.


When you or I feel down or very low in spirit, where do we go? Who would we turn to on a human level? For those who have a life partner, he or she will naturally be your go to person, but what if you are on your own, or for a reason best known to yourself you cannot share something with your life partner? The verse makes it clear that in the final analysis, it is “God who comforts the downcast”, but I believe it is a big help to be able to talk to a trusted friend. Not a casual acquaintance, but someone you can trust who will not spill your deepest cares to a third party. Paul’s earthly help came in the form of Titus, his trusted friend.


Never underestimate the strength and importance of your trusted friend. We all need one at some point in our life, and maybe more than once. They are not a substitute for God and His unconditional love, but important nonetheless. I love the way the Psalmist expresses it in Psalm 23:4 when he says: “though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me”. He is with us “through the valley of the shadow” and I know we can all identify with being in a deep valley with no one else to lean on but God.


No one suffered loneliness like Jesus when He hung on the cross and His Father God had forsaken Him for a period. So, take heart my friend, your low time will pass eventually. Lean on Jesus who understands completely, and your trusted friend if you are fortunate enough to have one.

Broken

The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

Why do good people suffer stress, and feel down to the point of depression? The psalmist David knew all about the feelings of being broken-hearted and a reading of the whole of Psalm 34 clearly shows his downcast heart. David had a lot to feel bad about, but he still knew that God was ‘close to the broken-hearted’ and can still save ‘those who are crushed in spirit’.

It is fair to say that everyone goes through the dark tunnel of despair at some time. Christians are not immune to this disease of the heart. It can range from a short term period, to a full blown depression caused by who knows what! Do you know someone close who has, or is still going through, a period of darkness? Maybe that person is you. One thing is certain, no one should be ashamed, thinking it is all their own fault. We gladly see our GP for physical ailments, but we are so reluctant to open up about our state of mind. We feel there is a stigma, and our reputation will suffer. Our friends will not look at us in the same way, and might avoid us. If so, they can still be our friends, but they are not true friends.

I love the way the Psalmist inserts the word ‘saves’ between the broken hearted, and the crushed in spirit. Take comfort in this my friend. Our great God saves us in our times of distress. He doesn’t help a little, or give us a smile and a nudge saying it’ll be ok, you’ll see. No, He SAVES us right where and when we need it. In our brokenness. When we can’t face Him, or even feel like praying. I don’t know about you, but this makes me feel like shouting hallelujah! And you? How does it make you feel? The prophet Isaiah says it so well, and it is a joy to read as he foretells the heart of the coming Messiah and our Saviour…..

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the broken-hearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favour

and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion – to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. Isaiah 61:1-3

Happy

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Blessed are those persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you. Matthew 5:3-12

Jesus says ‘Blessed’ nine times in as many verses, so should we not take note? Firstly the word ‘blessed’ also means ‘happy’. I don’t know about you, but there are some things in these verses which any of us would find hard to be happy about, but that’s the command straight from the lips of the Master, the author of our faith.

You will have been in the company of some positive, and happy people at some time and it is impossible to come away sad or discouraged. The happiness is contagious and their smile spreads to your lips and eyes without you even noticing. You can’t help it. The best thing you can do is to pass that happiness on when you meet the next person. The message I get from these verses is that your circumstances should not be bigger than your ability to be positive and be happy, or know you are blessed! Is that hard to do?

What about the opposite situation then? How do you feel when you share some time in the company of someone who runs everybody and everything down? Someone who hasn’t a kind or good word to say about anything, and who has a face like a ‘Lurgan Spade’ as my dad used to say. For those who don’t know, a Lurgan Spade is a long, thin spade for digging deep but narrow furrows. Get the picture? I guarantee you can’t get away soon enough, and when you do come away you feel depressed, unhappy and saddened. You don’t need that, so you make sure you avoid contact with that person as much as you can. Not easy if that person is family!

What do you want people to think of you as you are in their company? Yes, it makes a big difference when you are ‘blessed’ or ‘happy’ as Jesus wants and asks. It is no coincidence that the best witnesses for the kingdom are those who shine the happiness of salvation, and your friends or family will not be trying to avoid you either. How good is that? You get to witness and enjoy their company often, and that makes us blessed indeed.

Depression

Mention the word depression in any social setting, even with close friends, and the tone of the conversation drops like a stone. We know it happens, and we may even know some folks who have suffered from it, or sadly still do, but we want to keep a healthy distance. After all, it spoils an otherwise good evening, and if you are the one who brings the subject up, friends will distance themselves one by one until you are left on your own. Is that where any depressed person belongs?

Make no mistake, there is a short distance between anxiety and depression if not recognised and tackled both by the sufferer and his or her circle of friends. Like other internal issues, the signs can be well hidden, or perhaps seen but ignored and the last thing anyone wants is the stigma associated with the condition. After all, so the thought goes, you are only one step away from a straightjacket and a padded cell.

Anyone with a deep faith should never be depressed, I hear you say. You have salvation and so many things to live for, and maybe you are right, but there are examples in the Bible of men of God who succumbed to depression in different circumstances. So is it really so strange to think that someone you know will be close to their emotional limit?

If you want to help, here are some things to look for, but are rarely seen. A convincing and ready smile. An encouraging manner. The hard swallow lump in the throat. An unguarded emotional tear. You are looking for a master of facial and emotional disguise, so don’t be surprised when you see a friend ‘go under’ and find yourself saying, “I would never have guessed”. It just shows how good a job they did at hiding, and how poor a job we do as friends in not getting close enough to see, but be assured that you are not alone in missing the signs. The really sad and telling truth is that you probably won’t recognise the condition in your friend until they tip over the visible edge. Such is life!

Feeling Down?

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 2 Cor 4:8,9

These verses are a source of great encouragement to anyone who feels put down or depressed, and I think we can all identify with feeling low and almost abandoned by life (and God?) at times. Paul had reason to feel orphaned by God. Remember this was the same man who hounded and killed early Christians, and the same God who knocked him from his horse and blinded him to get his attention!

Fast forward to today. We in the ‘west’ are cossetted and protected by the laws of our lands, and freedoms, for which our forefathers fought. Now we don’t need to exercise our faith, and as a result that faith does not have the sense of urgency it demands. We don’t have to lean or depend on our God, so we don’t have to really test Him. Have you/we ever been abandoned or struck down because you stood up for Jesus? No, I didn’t think so. The worst that might happen is that we will be laughed at, or ignored. Sometimes I fear that our ‘fought for’ Christian freedoms are under attack, and that it may not be too long until they are eroded and we have to stand up and be counted. Will I/we be ready?

So, next time you think you are hard done to by life, and it makes you feel a bit low, remember there are those Christians who do not have the luxury of laws to protect their freedom to worship. The result is that these unfortunate folks may have to put their lives on the line for believing in Jesus, and in order to survive have to keep their faith active and real. I think what I am trying to say is, ‘...be thankful, quit moaning and appreciate all those faith freedoms we enjoy, while we can’!