Too Late?

I think a confession is needed, and I must come clean. If I don’t do it now, I might never be able to muster the courage again. As an explanation, this ‘thing’ didn’t happen to me overnight. It took ages for me to be aware of my failing, and even then only slowly. I called it a failing, but is it? Really??

The human body grows quite slowly compared to other species on our planet. As each phase comes and is replaced by the next one, we accept the changes as necessary. We dare not go into our teen years looking and thinking like a toddler. And similarly, our ageing bodies are not as strong and cannot react the way we did in mid life. By the time we are in the ‘end of life’ phase, we do not even remotely resemble our baby self. This is progress. It’s life, and we embrace it.

Why do I not embrace the changing faith years in the same way? The baby and toddler years when proper teaching was made in simple forms, followed by the teen years when the meat of the word was essential, and outreach performed with ease. The mid life years brought a crisis of the questioning heart, not to doubt but to learn because we never want to stop growing. By the time we reach the ‘end of faith’ years, we try to grasp at the younger times when everything was simpler and easier. Salvation was contagious and churches were full with people being reborn into the Kingdom almost without effort. Simply put, I want to go back.

Here’s the problem with my analogy. Everyone born starts at the same place in growth and progress, right through to our end of life phase. Then the cycle always restarts without change and growth is guaranteed. However, the faith years are not treated in the same way. Our ‘progressive’ church leaders seem to want our successive years of growth to be constant and without repeat. Or to put it another way, each generation at their faith birth, should start where the previous generation’s end of faith years left off. Using this as a model of church growth is it any wonder that we fall short? That kind of growth cannot be sustained in either the human being, or the faith model.

My confession about being too late is this: Do I keep running on the treadmill of artificial church growth, or should I let my faith journey be what it is supposed to be at each stage? If I stay on the treadmill, the progressives will applaud, but will it grow my faith or that of my church? On the other hand if I get off the spinning wheel I will be branded as a dinosaur and no one wants that. What do you think? Is it too late to stop the treadmill and get off? At least that would be good for my blood pressure. Perhaps it might not be a bad thing to be a dinosaur after all! Another, and better question is: Can, or should we even try, to reinvent the gospel or is it fine the way it was originally given for all ages and for all time in the Bible?

One of the dictionary definitions of ‘dinosaur’ is “a person or thing that is outdated or has become obsolete because of failure to adapt to changing circumstances.”

Dilemma

The definition of ‘dilemma’: “a situation in which a difficult choice has to be made between two or more alternatives, especially ones that are equally undesirable.”

Elijah went before the people and said, “How long will you waver between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him; but if Baal is God, follow him.” But the people said nothing.

1 Kings 18:21 NIV

The thing that jumps out of the page at me is the fact that the people said nothing. Can you believe it? They didn’t make a decision either way, and in today’s language they sat on the fence. I may be taking this verse out of some context, but allow me some slack here.

The easiest thing to do when faced with a difficult choice is nothing. That is especially true when either choice is not a good one, or pleasant. Why not bury our face in our hands, close our eyes, and hope it goes away? But it doesn’t, and in fact it never does. Note that Elijah says, “how long”, telling us that ultimately a choice is necessary.

How I recognise this truth. Stuck between two thoughts, beliefs, or opinions and staying quiet, in the forlorn hope that the situation wasn’t there. But it is, and eventually I need to make a decision. No matter which way I choose, there will be disappointment and possibly hurt feelings, if not mine then someone else’s.

I have argued with myself for too long. How I wish I had someone to talk to. It’s time to decide and live with the consequences. I know understanding will be in short supply, and criticism will follow, even from friends. But what is more important? Saying nothing and continue to stew, or take a stand for conscience and getting rid of this burden?